My friend shared with me this quote:
“the mountains you carry, you were only meant to climb.”
And it spoke to me deeply.
Today, I see life as a very very precious gift, one that I hope to share with others.
I find it a bit easier to share about my mum. Maybe because I have found more peace with it. Maybe because I have slowly started to share my rawest emotions with my closest friends. It’s still not easy. Sometimes I fear that I am too heavy a burden. But the stubborn ones who choose to stick around, who choose to love me even when I’m hard to love, who stay regardless of how messy I am, have made me want to dare to love fiercely. They mean the world to me, and life has just been more colourful with these crazily beautiful people around.
I learned that grief is not something to be ashamed of. Rather, it is something to accept and welcome into my life. The depth of grief is the depth of love. It hurts so much because I loved my mum deeply. Today, I am still learning to let the love in. And maybe one day, I will dare to love as fiercely, as I once did when I was a child.